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The endogamous and asymmetrical nature of couples bears this out: they often pair partners who are close in age, and in the case of heterosexual couples, usually place the man in the position of the elder
1Age is a structural element in dating. Observing the composition of existing couples does not provide an answer to this question: it reveals the final outcome, but remains silent as to how couples actually come into being. Understanding the way in which romantic relationships are formed, and the role of age in this process, necessarily involves taking an interest in how people meet and in the partner preferences that come into play in dating.
2This study looks at one type of relationship in particular: those that get started on online dating sites (cf. “Methods and Data” at the end of this article). These sites, dedicated to partner matching, have become increasingly popular in France since the early 2000s. While relationships usually start with an actual physical encounter, users of dating sites present themselves through “user profiles” before meeting in real life. This new scenario changes the role of age in partner selection: it gives priority to numerical age over social age, which takes precedence in face-to-face interactions. This article takes a closer look at this change in the way people meet. Because these sites alter the role played by age, they reveal all the better the way this characteristic operates in relationship formation.
They considerably widen the pool of potential partners, but at the same time, they change the process of dating and couple formation
3Thus through the prism of dating sites, the aim is to shed light on the significance of age in dating, not only online but also offline. The demonstration will take place in three steps. First, a brief overview of the history and the organization of online dating will show the way these sites alter the scenario of romantic and sexual encounters. Second, an analysis of users’ self-presentations will highlight the difficulty of translating one’s subjective age into chronological terms. Finally, users’ partner criteria will illustrate women’s and men’s different approaches to age and the gender inequality that exists in the way couples are formed.